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2. 

   4 things you should do this Friday night instead of texting your ex

   Advice, Break-ups (+1)

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3. 

   The do's and don'ts of doing the dumping: how to be classy and kind in a break-up

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4. 

   You told us the most brutal ways you were dumped and how y'all recovered from these is amazing

   Break-ups, Communication

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5. 

   Are your mates sexist?

   Red flags, Communication

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   (Quiz)

   Are your mates sexist?

   Ever hear your friends or whānau saying stuff to or about women/girls and think..."hmm, that's not right..."?

   Take the quiz below for some perspective on what's right and what isn't. 

   • Do you ever see your mates 're-explaining' things a girl or woman has just said

     Sometimes, yeah

     That’s a problem. 'Mansplaining', interrupting or talking over the top of a woman is a classic sign of disrespect and de-valuing a woman’s opinion, knowledge or point of view. Show respect in conversations by using eye contact and asking questions to make sure everyone is included and heard, especially people whose voices might often be silenced or devalued.

     Never

     Good, 'mansplaining', interrupting or talking over the top of a woman is a classic sign of disrespect and de-valuing woman’s opinion or point of view.

   • Do you ever see your mates paying more attention to what men are saying than women?

     Nah, that's not how they roll

     Great. Men will often ignore what a woman is saying but then be all ears when another guy has something to say – it’s disrespectful and a pretty obvious sign they don’t value women’s input.

     Now you mention it, yeah...

     Men will often ignore what a woman is saying but then be all ears when another guy has something to say – it’s disrespectful and a pretty obvious sign they don’t value women’s input. Show respect in conversations by using eye contact and asking questions to make sure everyone is included and heard, especially people whose voices might often be silenced or devalued.

   • Do you ever see your mates thinking that men are 'naturally superior' to women?

     In some ways, yes

     Whoa, that just makes no sense. Regardless of someone’s biology, gender or sexuality, nobody is superior to anybody else.

     No

     Good, regardless of someone’s biology, gender or sexuality, nobody is superior to anybody else.

   • Do you ever see your mates yelling at women on the street or in public spaces?

     No way.

     Good, nobody should have to put up with strangers harassing, yelling at them or approaching them uninvited in any way.

     Yeah, that happens.

     Whaaaat?! No way anybody should have to put up with strangers harassing, yelling at them or approaching them uninvited in any way.

   • Do you ever see your mates making jokes about women or girls being 'bitches', 'thots', 'sluts' or 'whores'?

     Under no circumstances.

     Excellent, doesn’t matter if it’s dressed up as a joke or not – using that kinda language in relation to women or girls is a disgusting example of misogyny and disrespect.

     Hm, maybe just as a joke?

     Nup, never, no-way, no-how, doesn’t matter if it’s dressed up as a joke or not – using that kinda language in relation to women or girls is a disgusting example of misogyny and disrespect.

   • Do you ever see your mates making assumptions about a woman because of what she's wearing?

     Only if they're wearing something flat out obvious.

     Nope, you just can’t make judgments about someone because of what they’re wearing – and women should be able to wear whatever they want without fear of judgement or disrespect.

     Nah, never.

     Good, you can’t make judgments about someone because of what they’re wearing – and women should be able to wear whatever they want without fear of judgement or disrespect.

   • Do you ever see or hear of your mates putting pressure on someone to have sex?

     No, they know that's not right.

     Great, it’s absolutely critical everyone understands consent and free agreement. This means both people are doing things because they want to, not because they feel forced.

     Yeah, it happens.

     Nope, it’s absolutely critical everyone understands consent and free agreement. This means both people are doing things because they want to, not because they feel forced.

   • Do you ever see your mates encouraging women to express their opinions?

     For sure!

     Great! Encouraging anyone – but especially women, whose voices are often ignored by men – to feel like their points of view are valued and respected is a must.

     Hm, not that I've noticed.

     Damn, that’s got to change. Encouraging anyone – but especially women, whose voices are often ignored by men – to feel like their points of view are valued and respected is a must.

   • Do you see your mates encouraging and praising people for their achievements, regardless of their gender?

     Totally.

     Excellent, we should appreciate, celebrate and encourage the things people achieve no matter who they are.

     Maybe not so much.

      Aw c’mon, we need to appreciate, celebrate and encourage the things people achieve no matter who they are.

   • Do you ever see your mates encouraging women to get tipsy so they're more ‘relaxed’ about having sex?

     Yeah, that definitely happens among my friends.

     That’s got to stop now. Apart from the fact that people often can’t legally give consent if they’re intoxicated, sex should happen because everyone’s feeling enthusiastic and safe – not because someone’s been coerced with alcohol or drugs.

     Whoa, no, that's not something anyone I know would ever do.

     Excellent. Apart from the fact that people often can’t legally give consent if they’re intoxicated, sex should happen because everyone’s feeling enthusiastic and safe – not because someone’s been coerced with alcohol or drugs.

   • Awesome, sounds like you and your friends are pretty respectful of others, including women and girls. If you ever see misogyny or disrespect it seems like you'd be pretty confident to call it out. 

     This quiz has been borrowed from Are your mates sexist? | The Line

   • Hmm, sounds like there are some sexist or disrespectful behaviours you've noticed in your friends group. Might be time for a chat about it! For advice on how to do this, check out this article. 

     This quiz has been borrowed from Are your mates sexist? | The Line

   • Oh dear...sounds like there are some worrying attitudes among your friends. This behaviour can lead to serious violence against women and needs to be addressed ASAP. See this article for advice on how to call out your mates' bad behaviour. 

     This quiz has been borrowed from Are your mates sexist? | The Line

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